Motherhood is fast and fleeting… some days/Advice for new Moms of Twins

Our twins turned seven on Saturday.  This picture of them snuggling together, poorly wrapped by this inexperienced mom, was taken on the day they came home from the hospital.  They seemed so fragile at that time.  Nate weighed 4.8 pounds and Ryann was 5.3 pounds.  They were teensy, but healthy.

We had a night nanny for a few nights when they first came home so I could get some sleep.  Adam had to sleep as he was working on a crazy busy show at that time.  When she left, I was so scared to be across the hallway from them.  It felt too far away.  I slept on their floor just to listen to their breathing on many a night.

The days after they were born, at first, were a hazy blur of diaper changes, sleep deprivation and many photo opps that were shared with our families.

That changed when Adam had the opportunity to take some time off.  He asked me if I wanted to take the babies and go across the country in our motor home.  If not, he’d go back to work.  Hell yes, I said! I was so thrilled with the idea of getting out of the house and spending time with Adam and the kids and our two dogs.  It was a perfect trip, really.  Every where we went, people fawned over us and the babies.  No one could believe that we actually took to the road with two tiny infants.  In so many ways, it’s the best thing we’ve ever done.  Thankfully, our pediatrician, the amazing Dr. Vivian Liu, okayed our trip and gave us her blessing.  And, best of all, Adam had the time and the opportunity to bond with the babies like I did.  He’s an awesome dad, and an amazing husband.

One of the first stops on our trip was Bryce Canyon, Nevada.  It was exceedingly hot, but dramatically beautiful.  Look how great my husband is – he’s hiding my post-baby-belly with his body for this photo!

It’s funny – I look back at these pictures and think – I was beautiful.  And obviously happy.  So happy.  What more could a woman ask for?

We traveled to Indiana, to visit with Adam’s family.

It was incredibly special to be able to drive our newborn babies to our family – 2,000 miles across country!  From Indiana, we drove to Charleston, South Carolina, to visit my Dad, a.k.a. “Boston John.”

Being in our motor home with the babies and dogs was incredibly comforting.  To this day,  I treasure the trips we take in the motor home.  I love being able to hear everyone breathing at night.  I love listening to Ryann talk in her sleep and giggle at silly dreams.  I love listening to Marley Moose Goldberg snore.  Here she is watching over her babies during an afternoon nap…

On the way home we stopped at Graceland.  These kids were well-travelled by the time they hit 12 weeks!

The trip was a once-in-a-lifetime adventure.  I’m so glad we did it.  I hated coming home.  I dreaded being alone with the babies, and missing my guy.

I survived the long tedious days when we came home….and often, it was a joy taking care of them!

What is the point of this blog?  It’s this:

1.)  Take time to go out and have fun when your babies are young.  Go travel.  Go out to dinner.  Your kids will never be better behaved than they are when they are infants.  Enjoy it!

2.)  Know that you are not alone.  You will have dark and long days by yourself.  Reach out to mothers of multiples organizations like Beach Cities Parents of Multiples Association.  You will not regret it!

3.) Remember this:  these days really are fast and fleeting.  I cannot believe my little beach babies are 7.  You will survive.  You can thrive.  It’s a choice.

How did you survive the early days with your multiples?  Do you have advice to share?

 

Kristy Kaplon

On Tuesday, April 12th, we held a giant fundraiser at two Fresh Brothers locations (Westlake & Calabasas)  benefiting the Kaplon family.

On March 17th, Brian Kaplon, a young father and husband, was shot and killed by a friend.   Brian’s wife, Kristi, is a mom to two and half year-old daughter, Kloe.  She is also expecting twins in May.  One of the most difficult parts of this story to digest is the fact that the Kaplon’s had no life insurance.  Brian had applied for it, but he was killed before the application could be fully processed.

My friend, Jen Levinson, is Kristi’s cousin and is one of her dear friends.  (Jen is mom to five kids – four of those are twins!)   I learned about what happened to the Kaplan family through Jen.  I could not help but be sickened, saddened and concerned about Kristi, Kloe and the babies.  As a mother of twins, I could not fathom enduring parenthood to baby twins without a spouse.  I had a tough time.  I’m not sure who doesn’t when you have two babies at once!  Jen approached us about doing a fundraiser for the Kaplon’s and we immediately said yes.

It was a beautiful day.  Both stores were insanely busy, but it was well worth the extra effort.  Our staff kicked it into high gear and worked their butts off to make sure the day went smoothly.

I didn’t take any pictures, it didn’t seem right.  But Kristi and Kloe were both there.  People were dining outside on long communal tables.  There was a lot of love and laughter surrounding Kristi and Kloe.  KCBS and KCAL came out to talk with Kristi.  Hopefully the additional media coverage helped channel extra donations for the family.

We raised $2500 for the Kaplon family.  We donated 20% back of all sales from both locations that day.  I am so thrilled that we were able to do this for this young family who is struggling to stay afloat during this difficult time.

As a business owner, as a mother, as a wife, I’m proud that we were able to bring our community together to help this mom out.  Thank you to all who helped us make this happen!

If you would like to make a contribution on behalf of the Kaplon family, please click on this link:  https://sites.google.com/site/kristikaplon/home?pli=1

 

It Takes a Village of Moms to Raise Multiples

When Adam and I found out that I was pregnant with twins, we were ecstatic. And terrified. Big time.

I quickly went to work and did my research on parenting and mothering twins. It was overwhelming. I remember a holiday visit from my in-laws and we decided it would be fun to go shopping at Babies R Us. Wrong. I was so overloaded with lists and questions and oh-my-G-d we are having twins what do we need thoughts I became sick to my stomach. I think we were in the store for about fifteen minutes total and then left.

Somehow I found out about the Beach Cities Parents of Multiples Organization. We joined online and went to a introductory meeting. I remember a handful of giant pregnant women, like me! I remember playing some silly games that seemed really lame but served as ice-breakers. I remember thinking – answers, they have answers! And they did.

Soon after Nate and Ryann were born, I joined a playgroup with other moms of multiples who had babies born around the same time frame. It initially seemed ridiculous to do so – I was barely getting out of the house and was sleep deprived. We had an active group of members who communicated a lot via email. They were a great resource. I could type out of a message or a question to the group in the middle of the night and wake up to responses from moms who were just like me, experiencing the same things at the same time. We shared baby sitter referrals, sleep training advice, belly-fat horror stories and many laughs along the way. We eventually named ourselves the “Wed. Twin Playgroup” although we had (and still have) two moms of triplets in our group.

The kids in our group are now 5-7 years old. I still belong to the “Wed. Twin Playgroup” although I don’t get to see them much due to my work schedule. I cannot imagine life as a mom of twins without those ladies.

I decided to make my first post on Manhattan Beach Momma about BCPMA because I truly value this organization. I was President of the club for two years. I cannot participate now as much I have in the past, but I am one of their biggest fans. I cannot walk by a new mom of multiples at Costco without stopping her, talking about the babies, and making sure she knows about the BCPMA.

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